life changes


in life the only constant thing is change. i went through university for journalism, i received a whole whack load of certificates, diplomas and degrees but my main focus was on journalism. i love to write, sure i may not always punctuate properly or use my caps lock key but i know when and how to use the fundamentals and basics. if i were being graded right now i’d knock your freaking socks off, but that’s not how i see this blog. this is my escape and it’s really not meant for anyone other than me. i mean go ahead and follow it but if this thing never takes off then it never takes off. i’m sort of a “jack of all traits” and i never know which direction my life might be heading in next. i used to be a tom boy. i was embarrassed to wear skirts, never did my hair and never wore makeup. it wasn’t until my senior year in highschool that i started to have a budding interest in the whole dolling myself up thing. i’ve always had this philosophy, if you don’t know how to do something (like apply makeup) you shouldn’t do it. but, i see now that that’s not the appropriate approach to life. you succeed through trial and error. yes, some people are born with a talent but they foster and nurture it to make it bloom. others however, have to work harder to achieve what comes naturally to some. once i got into university i started watching youtube videos A LOT and even considered starting my own channel. but, my lack of self-confidence makes it hard to promote myself so it would likely never turn into a business for me as it has for so many. i am obsessed with vlogs. the shaytards and charles trippy seem like family more than strangers. i equally love hair and makeup tutorials kandee johnson, michelle phan, zoella and taliajoy18 (RIP) are some of my favourite youtubers to watch. their content yet helpful is entertaining. i don’t find myself skipping to the end to see how it turns out, i enjoy the process. and thus my passion.. if i can call it that for hair and makeup was born. surprisingly i’m not half bad, and more and more  frequently i find people telling me “hey vic, you should charge people for this” and in my head i’m thinking would you like me to start with you? my issue with charging people is A. i have no real schooling or training to back up my prices and B. that’s too much pressure. think of the times someone would want to hire a makeup artist or a hair stylist, weddings, graduations, proms… the fate of someones night rests on my shoulders. how you look is a direct reflection of how you feel. if you look like a million dollars you’re going to present yourself as a millionaire. confidence is something i lack, confidence in myself and in my skills and that’s what holds me back. i make excuses as to why i shouldn’t do things based on the fact that i think i cant. i need to throw it back to a few sentences ago when i said “you succeed through trial and error” and allow myself to succeed and fail.


the thought has been festering in my mind. maybe i will attempt to start my own business and brand myself. i would make a pretty kickass entrepreneur! <- my attempt at confidence boosting



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