WTF’S A TOM BOY

WARNING: this is a rant.

 recently something really set me off. to be honest, i can’t remember how the conversation came about but we got on the topic of my co-workers niece and how she wants to be a boy. she’s 8 and i don’t think she meant she wanted the genitalia of a boy, she wanted the “perks” of being a boy. ever since she’s been little she’s had “boy-like” interests. she doesn’t wear dresses, her favourite colour is blue, she refuses to take her hair out of a pony-tail and her favourite movie is star wars (star trek? i’m not even sure what the difference is). she sounds great, right? what made me think was, why are these things considered “boy-like”. why is Toys ‘R’ Us split girls toys vs boy toys. why do you have to be a specific gender to be able to have interests in specific things? i’m a girl. i like make-up and hair products, admittedly my hygiene could be better. i’m not always shaven like a naked mole rat, to be honest i’m hardly ever shaven. i don’t like getting my nails done, or getting my eyebrows or lip waxed because frankly i consider it a waste of money. my favourite toy growing up was this digimon hand-held toy. digimon, is that still a thing? i guess my confusion is, it’s 2017 almost everything is legal and they encourage you to be so accepting that you’re considered homophobic or racist for having an opinion. why aren’t children free to have interests or hobbies without judgment or gender limitations?

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i would honestly just love for someone to explain to me, why boys get; pokemon cards, hockey cards, dinky cars, action figures, super heros, masks, swords, ninja turtles, power rangers, lego, sports, video games, hot wheels and nurf guns. while girls get barbies, princesses and fucking easy bake ovens.  

prince charming doesn’t exist

with valentines day hot on our heels i thought now was a good a time as any to set the record straight. ladies, i know this statement is bold – but it’s true, there is no such thing as prince charming simply because there’s no such thing as cinderella.

you’re not Cinderella so why should he have to be prince charming? i’m not saying this to be rude or too put anyone down, i’m just saying it’s unrealistic for us women to look like her, act like her or conduct ourselves as she conducts her self. bitchPrincesses-and-their-Prince-disney-princess-10993899-800-600 talks to birds for god sakes. no man puts you on a cinderella pedestal. if he loves you, he loves you for who you are. he loves your morning breath, your face without makeup, your hair in a ratchet bun, and your boobs when they’re concealed. so love him the same way back; embrace your time together even if it’s kickin’ it with the boys watching god knows what sport. relationships should be 50/50 no unwritten or written girl codes. no list of things he must do to prove he’s interested. none of that chivalry bullshit, just because he doesn’t open your car door doesn’t mean he isn’t in love with you. fun fact – just because he does open your car door doesn’t mean he loves you either.

i’m constantly reading these blogs about how women think they should be treated, and it’s great for you too know you deserve all of those things and more. all I’m saying is don’t let your one slip away because he never picked up the check, or because he couldn’t help but brag to his boys about how fine you are when you snuck off to the bathroom.

i’m not saying i know everything there is too know about men or love for that matter. i’m just saying, every prince is different and your job as his queen is to treat him like your king.

all about that bass…

b2b9e5e189bafcaa6e54e69fb11e0641so i couldn’t help but notice recently that theres been some all about that bass controversy. here’s the thing (disclaimer, im curvy) i don’t find the song the least bit offensive, and neither should you “skinny bitches”. people are hyper sensitive. if you’re going to have body issues, you’re going to have body issues. but, in a world where we’re told that thigh gaps are hot, meghan trainors song is a sigh of relief. do you expect us curvy girls to never look at another ad, watch another tv show or pick-up another magazine? it’s unrealistic to think that i’m going to lock myself away to avoid people scrutinizing my body, or making me feel like i should look another way. that’s where loving yourself for who you are and what you have been given comes in. inner beauty, inner confidence that’s what should matter – and that’s what’s put on the back burner. and if all that up there wasn’t convincing enough for critics too lay off lets have a look at the lyrics.

i’m bringing booty back
go ahead and tell them skinny bitches that
no, I’m just playing. i know you think you’re fat
but i’m here to tell ya
every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top

having it there for you in its entirety should be proof enough, there’s no hate here. she even addresses the fact that most skinny girls don’t even consider themselves to be skinny. everyone has their demons their insecurities and their flaws. so can we all just give it a rest and let us big booty bitches have our moment?

all hallows eve

Screen Shot 2014-10-21 at 11.32.32 AM with halloween upon us it has inspired me to write what could possibly just turn into another rant (oh how i love ranting). i have noticed over the past couple of years that halloween has lost its fear factor. costumes are no longer about who can be the most creative, who is the ugliest or who is the scariest.. it is literally an excuse for women and men alike to wear as little clothes as possible in hopes of getting as much ass as possible. and i mean, that’s great a night where you can look like a slut but no one accuses you of being a slut, who doesn’t love that right? what i’m more concerned about is why are costumes geared and tailored for 10-14 year old girls super short, super tight and super revealing? see i know it’s not my place to parent other peoples children but seriously mom, dad what the hell goes through your mind when you let little suzy leave the house as a dead cheerleader with her midriff baring and her ass cheeks hanging? please inform me on how that’s not even just inappropriate, but cute or acceptable? i guess i can understand not wanting to argue with a brat, but how about not raising a brat… that would save my eyes and your wallets a lot of trouble.

disclaimer, i dressed up as a female pimp for halloween, not my idea TRUST ME. but my friend had her heart set on being a pregnant crack whore #winning

disclaimer: this is a rant

it takes a lot, and i mean A LOT to make me angry. however, there are three things that are guaranteed to piss me off every time – ONE: when the people i care about get taken advantage of, TWO: getting scammed and THREE: reading the comments section on youtube. you can lie to my face, talk about me behind my back or basically stab me and i find a way to keep my composure because i don’t fancy drama. apparently i haven’t blogged in a while and here’s what’s currently irking me.

i, like many others have succumbed to the pressure of purchasing a macbook in my university career. don’t get me wrong i love my mac but with a 2,600 dollar price tag i have one major bone to pick with apple. why the hell does it cost 59.99 to talk to someone about the issues you’re having with your device once it’s off of its warranty? are your products that shitty that you need to implement that sort of procedure? do you not think 2,600 plus the money it costs for accessories and programming is enough? obviously not.

so i go to future shop this week to try and find some sort of replacement, which was not another macbook pro because i can get 4 HPS for the price of one mac, and there’s a man there with his sons tablet. he bought the 2 year extended warranty for 70 dollars and was told it covered any problems he could incur over the next three years. so, his problem you may be wondering.. his son forgot his password and he needed to get it reset. the price tag on that you ask, 50 dollars. i walked over to the man, asked him if he was okay with losing his data on it and he said yes. i reset his tablet right there for him with the help of google at no charge. someone behind that desk knew how to do that, just like the man that sold him the warranty knew it didn’t cover everything.

so i left that future shop empty handedly like a boss. and i’m making this vow to myself. i vow to never buy “the best” of anything because frankly it’s all crap and the person who sold it to me is likely a crook.

opinons are like…

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i rant and rave, a lot. i have many opinions most of which i don’t share in fear of hurting someone’s feelings, but my minds always racing. and i feel like some people, correction, most people don’t have the same set of standards. so why am i so afraid? i never give my opinion unless it’s warranted. if someone says to me “he vic, what do you think?”, i’ll reply honestly. i’ll tell you how i feel without boundaries because you asked. i’m not about that talk about people’s private issues in secret in a gossiping manor. it’s not me. i think i’m lucky because i can take criticism.. you can tell me what you think and often i’ll laugh it off. i laugh it off not because i don’t care about what you’re saying, i laugh it off because your position is invalid. i am comfortable enough in my skin, in my relationships and in my life to not, not already know what you’re about to say. apparently hindsight is 20/20 but honestly you should be able to predict someone’s stance on an issue by looking at life from another perspective. take yourself out of your shoes and wear someone elses. this piece had more of a direction when i started it, most of them do but i get lost. maybe i’m being ignorant in thinking that my way of living is better than someone elses. maybe i have it wrong. i just think that if you’re bold enough to comment on someone’s anything behind their back, you should be bold enough to state your opinion too their face. and, if this is not the case if you find yourself to be too cowardly (much like myself) wait until your opinion is asked for. you’ll be a lot happier.

 

i read, i write

i tweet:@victorialangley

i tumbl: twostepsforward-o-n-e-stepback.tumblr.com

 

life’s too short…

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we are all allotted an amount of time on this earth, granted some of us longer than others. some of us have harder battles to fight and tougher roads to travel but each of us should have a common goal – not to hold grudges. it’s a tale as old as time itself, people go years without talking to someone they once couldn’t live without over something so small. obviously, at the time, nothing seems small.. but when it’s over, when it’s all really over and the person you’re mad at is no longer there to be mad at your heart fills with sorrow.  it fills with sorrow for the lost years, the years that could’ve been spent one way but were spent another. even if you have the chance to reconcile, to make amends when they’re gone… when they’re really gone you’ll still regret the times that were spent arguing. it’s funny because humans like extremities; love and hate, happiness and anger, rich and poor. the middle area, the grey area.. most people struggle to comprehend. i don’t have to love you, or i don’t have to hate you. i don’t have to be happy, or i don’t have to be angry. i don’t have to be rich, or i don’t have to be poor. i can fall somewhere in the middle, i can be content. i can be content with life, love, work and family. i can strive to do better and be better but i can feel completely relevant not feeling anything at all. i’ve seen too many good people go before their time, have had too many good people walk out of my life and have walked out of too many good people’s lives for reason that are simply foolish. you don’t have to love everyone, but try your best to like everyone. tell the people you love that you love them while you have the time. spend time with the people you love, when you have the time to spend. treat everyone you meet with the dignity and respect that they deserve to be treated with. live your life with a smile because no one wants to live it any other way. and lastly, be thankful for today because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed for any of us.

 

i read, i write

i tweet:@victorialangley

i tumbl: twostepsforward-o-n-e-stepback.tumblr.com

what is love…

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what is love. people often come to me for advice on their relationships and  i try to help them, to the best of my ability. i don’t have much experience, and the experience i do have is unlike many others. but, this is all i can say, love whoever you want to love regardless of what other people think. there are so many factors that contribute to the stability and longevity of a relationship. if you can love each other through the b/s it’ll only make you stronger when you come out the other end… that sounds weird. but vic, you might be thinking to yourself, we come from different religions, different races, and different social classes. and to that i say, those things only make loving someone easier. if you wakeup every morning wondering if today could be the last day that you have someone special in your life, you’ll be more willing to forgive, brush off or let go of the small things. if you knew that tomorrow your significant other was going to die, would that change the way you treated them today? it’s crazy because life isn’t like that you rarely get warning and even when you do it doesn’t make having someone no longer there any less tragic. and that’s what makes life unfair. you build a world with someone and one day it crashes. they don’t have to die, they just have to leave your life, for whatever reason, before you’re ready to see them go. and it’s at that moment when you’ll decide if you’re strong enough to pick up the pieces and move on. if they left you will you work on yourself so you’re the best version of you that you could be, shall your paths cross again. and if they’ve been taken from you before their time and before yours, will you be strong enough to carry them with you forever. will you see their beauty in beautiful things, and hear there laugh in moments of silence. life is tough  love is simple. love them today for who they are today. love them today for how they make you feel everyday not just in a moment of stress. and love them today because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed for any of us.

i read, i write

i tweet:@victorialangley

i tumbl: twostepsforward-o-n-e-stepback.tumblr.com

moments.

i’ve been thinking about moments a lot lately. moments that define who you’ve become. moments you wish you could take back or relive. it’s so surreal to me how quickly 18-22 went. i feel like i turned 18 yesterday. i was graduating highschool really at the peak of my teenage years. and then i think of all the people that were there when i was 18 but i haven’t talked to in years. life is crazy, the ride is crazy and sometimes it can be cruel. before i know it i’ll be 26 looking back on 22 – and this moment, the moment i decided to start living my life and stop letting it pass me by. i’m so consumed with work and making money, that 18-22 has been just that eighteen to twenty-two. its been a wild ride, don’t get me wrong. i got to spend the past 4 years with hands down the greatest man on the face of this planet, but other then that.. other then love – i have nothing to show. no long lasting friendships, no career highs, academic lows, no one night stands, epic weekend stories, nothing. there’s nothing. so i vow from this day forward to make memories, to make moments.

me on my 18th birthday in the car i no longer own.

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i read, i write

i tweet:@victorialangley

i tumbl: twostepsforward-o-n-e-stepback.tumblr.com